Three Tips for Taking Care of Yourself as a Caregiver

An old adage says, “You can’t take care of others if you can’t take care of yourself.”  We’ve all heard variations on this longstanding quote but the meaning is still the same – take care of yourself first. That was something my loved ones frequently reminded me about in 2012 when my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and I became her caregiver. At that time, self-care seemed selfish to me.

How could I even think about putting my own needs and wants before my mom's when she was the one who was afflicted?

It wasn’t until I was diagnosed with a health condition in 2014 that I fully understood the importance of taking care of myself first. When I got sick, my initial thought was of my mother and who would care for her if I no longer could. My sister reassured me that our mother would ALWAYS be cared for and that as a family, we were well-prepared and devoted to helping her through her journey. And then my big sister looked me dead in my eyes and said, “Now we have to focus on you!”

Putting me first was not an easy task, because I was always a ‘doer’ throughout my life both personally and professionally. It gives me personal joy to see others enriched in some way by my actions. Even if it means sacrificing on my end, to me it is simply a small price to pay. But I started to slowly realize that I had paid enough and it was time to stop being a lowly caregiver and start becoming an empowered care partner. Empowerment started with me, first. I learned that I needed to take care of myself emotionally, physically and socially.

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